RESET

Mama needed a TIMEOUT today after working 3 weeks straight; thankfully, it all culminated in a very big, very successful meeting in California. So many days of nonstop working will do a number on your old lady. We needed a reset button.  First on my list of things to do? Hang with you, of course.

We called in FUN to school, cancelling your day of growth and education (much to the dismay of your teachers, and my conscience), gave cause to launch into breakfast and a day of awesomeness with our favorite cousins. We ate pancakes, we drank hot chocolate, we went swimming, we snacked on pistachios. We were human again. Nothing like a reset day with the best, most fun, hilarious, and energetic little dude on the planet, and our super cool friends. It just melts my heart to see you play with your boys, Jackson and Maverick. It's truly the cutest thing - you love them, and they take SUCH good care of you - like you were their brother, I mean, you basically ARE brothers. Each day I am more and more thankful for this beautiful life and these incredibly amazing, generous, thoughtful friends (family) we have. We are so, so lucky bud. What a great day. 

It.

Was.

Awesome.

Adventures in berry picking!

Your school is closed this week so mommy and daddy are taking shifts staying home with you. Also, it happens to be summertime and absolutely drop-dead gorgeous outside!!! 

This morning we decided to go on an early morning berry picking adventure with our favorite friends, Maverick and Lori! (Before work emails started to really roll in).

Too fun!! Who knew this farm was right in our backyard just up the hill? 

We rolled up to the Skeeters Farm for u-pick blueberries. $2 bucks a pound. Whatta deal. 

At first you weren't so sure. 

Then you started helping pick the berries and put them in the bucket.

Then you realized you could actually eat them right there, and you were done for. 

...and then you got cranky and it was time for a nap - at your request of course. 

We live in such a beautiful part of the country. I'm so thankful that we can take a drive up the hill and pick berries in our bare feet overlooking this gorgeous valley. We are one lucky bunch. 

Now...what to do with 5 lbs of blueberries?!?

Love.

talk to me.

talk to me, kiddo.
talk to me.

I love that you can communicate.
sometimes. hah.
That, and you're so dang expressive. You never hesitate to tell us when you want a "love" (hug) or a kiss. I want you to always feel safe and comfortable when expressing your feelings, and it makes me so happy to see you loving up on everyone. Before bed: "Gimme WUV, gimme kiss, mommy, daddy". My heart sings.

You tell us everything you want and need. and it's awesome. Your daddy, well, he's a talker, and I can't help but feel like this is you taking after him. You talk us through your every emotion, feeling, thought.
You have so many opinions and observations. It's inspirational, really, to join you in your world. It's way more fun through your eyes.

Here's an interview with you yesterday all about your favorites:

Favorite Color: Yellow (later, in a video, it was pink, flipflopper. perhaps you have a future in politics?)
Favorite Food: Yummy
Favorite Teacher: ShiShi (Shannon)
Favorite Animal: Tigers
Who's your best friend? : Benny (and later, it was Dustin)
Mommy or Daddy? : Daddy
Grandpa or Grandma? : Grandpa
(guess you're a dudes dude for now)
Hamburgers or Hotdogs? : Tacos (duh)
Camping or Beach? : Camping at the beach (smart kid, no really, you said this)
Ocean or Mountains? : mountains

Other favorite sayings lately:
When you're cranky and don't want to do ANYTHING: "I JUST NOT" ~whatever that means
cute, agreeable you: "yep"
still: "I'm so happy to see you"
While we were camping, you rolled over to daddy in the morning after sleeping in bed with us (for only the third time ever): "Hi Daddy. You're so nice to me".

You also have books memorized to such a tee that you can read them back to us. Trip out. Your favorite books that you've memorized are: Dr. Seuss' Marvin K Mooney (Go Go Go book), Dr. Seuss' Green Eggs and Ham, Skippy Jon Jones, Dinosaur Friends, Dr. Seuss One Fish Two Fish. It seriously blows my mind that you can read entire books to me. and you don't know how to read - as far as I know.

Guess what else? You LOVE camping. I mean really, I've never seen a kid more in his element. You explore, you throw rocks in the river, you ride your bike, you build fires (with assistance) - I shouldn't be surprised; from the time you were born, all it took to calm you down was to take you outside. You're just like your daddy.
We've already gone camping a handful of times, there's too many trips to document, but here's a few shots of you and your buds in the great outdoors.

And here's you talking about your favorite things:

You are my Sunshine ☼

It’s been a rough couple of weeks. We’re really, really trying to make lemonade out of these lemons right now, but the dang things are nearly dry. When it feels like enough is enough, whenever I even get close to throwing in the towel, there you are. A sticker on my hand since morning, and a smile at the door when I come home. You've brightened up what's been a pretty dark day. You rescue me with your smiles and your laughter. Your imagination takes me on a trip to somewhere far away, a place I didn't know existed. Tonight we took Superman to the grocery store where we bought mcdonalds nuggets and fries, where we talked to dinosaurs about how happy we were. And they knew we were happy because we just went to the park and went down the slide, and we were smiling really big. That imagination, already, at 2? Are you kidding me?

And there I was, sitting next to you sopping wet (may as well have been in the bathtub), with a superman truck in one hand and your little piggy that had roast beef in the other, and I realized I had forgotten about all that ails me right now. You are life. You’re it. I am so, so thankful God put you here, in my bathtub.

Thanks for being so freaking cool, bud. So.freaking.cool.

#materpower

https://vine.co/v/hB9EXTjIYKT

The things this boy says

Me: "Sawyer, are you the cutest thing that's ever existed?"

Sawyer: "yeah, mama. I'm just happy. I like to smile" (smiles)

Be still. My. 

Ketchup

Oh, man.  I have been majorly neglecting this blog - bad mommy! Truth: It's been a freaking CRAZY few months. I've been traveling a ton, missing you like crazy. So when I have a spare 15 minutes, chances are good that I'm either cuddling up with you or....sleeping. SO SORRY!!

Here's an attempt to highlight some of our best moments:

AUNT MARSHA VISITS!!! We don't have a huge family, but the extended family we do have is amazing. Marsha made the trek out to Oregon from her home in Idaho and it was the best thing ever to see her and watch her love up on you. You sure charmed her, bud. We were sad to say goodbye at the end of her visit, but so very thankful for the time we had with this angel. 

YO GABBA GABBA LIVE!! Our generous friends at Nickelodeon gifted us with tickets to go see Gabba live and oh man was it fun to watch your eyes light up as each character jumped up onto the stage. You weren't quite sure in the beginning, but as soon as you saw BIZ MARKEE you absolutely lost it. It still blows my mind how happy it makes me just to see you happy. 

SO MUCH ZOO!!! You love animals and trains. The Oregon Zoo is your candyland. Grandpa got us all zoo memberships, so we've been visiting the zoo quite a bit. Your favorites are the Giraffe's, elephants and of course, the zoo train.

NEWPORT BAY AQUARIUM // We took a superfun daytrip to Newport Bay to visit the aquarium. You loved the seals and the fishes and were super stoked to see the sharks in the tube. 

CUDDLES // My favorite thing is our morning cuddles. We've been doing this a lot - you come into our bedroom and jump up right next to me. It's the sweetest and best thing to wake up to EVER. You are so kind and gentle, and you really do love your mommy right now - I dig this phase. 

WEEKEND TRIP TO YACHATS // We spent a weekend at the beach with your Grandma & Grandpa. So so fun. It was all relaxation time. My highlights were introducing you to Disney movies: Snow White in particular. Oh, and taking you to Rogue Brewery headquarters. All of my favorite things in one place = so totally awesome.

You turned 2!! (in February, 3 months ago...oops)

Time is FLYING by! I can't believe you're already 2.
And if I'm being completely honest, I feel like you're super advanced. I know every mommy probably feels this way, but I really think you are! Everyone is impressed by your vocabulary - you're able to express yourself in a way I didn't think 2 year olds could. You have compassion and sympathy, you're incredibly intuitive and checked in to your environment, and you're funny. OMG are you so funny - you have wit and timing down for your funny little sayings. It's crazy.
My favorite quality of yours though - you are the absolute sweetest little thing. You love to give "loves" (hugs) and kisses. Your Grandma came over yesterday and you told her "I'm glad to see you, Grandma". You proclaim that you're "Happy" ALL the time. You hug all of your friends the minute you get to school. You are just so stinking sweet!

For your 2nd Birthday, we went to Slappy Cakes (a pancake hibachi style fun restaurant on SE Belmont). We got the big table and had a super awesome breakfast and made super awesome pancakes.
From there, we went to the Children's Museum - which you LOVED. That night we had a dinner, ate cake and played all night long until you were so conked, you put yourself to bed.
A super fun, mellow birthday just for you.

Simple as this...

Sunday morning, sunshine, coffee, jammies, nemo, basketball.

"Mommy, why are you crying?"

Dear sweet, sweet boy,

Obviously, I have much to update your blog on. It’s been 3 months and I've been seriously neglectful to your blog.

In the short term, I feel compelled to put this down in writing so I don't forget it. More to come on major milestones soon...

We recently lost a beloved member of our family. Our little doggie Lucy is now up in heaven with Josephine. It’s an understatement to say that I’ve had a rough go of it.

But you, sweet boy, you are an angel. The night she passed, I was an absolute wreck, inconsolable. I was curled up by the bonfire outside that night, bawling my eyes out. I didn't want you to see me in such disarray so daddy kept you inside. As I sat alone by the fire, I felt you creep up quietly behind me. You had snuck outside. You stood there next to me and just stared at me – it was clear you had never seen your mama cry, and it made zero sense to you.

“Mommy, why are you crying?”, as you reached out and placed your hand on my thigh.

“Mommy’s sad, buddy. Mommy's really sad.”

“Mommy, don’t cry, it’ll be OK, Mommy. It’s OK mama. Don’t cry.”

I reached over and you gave me the biggest hug...it lingered. Like you knew what it meant. It was just what I needed to pull me back to Earth and heal my heart.

You are just the absolute sweetest little guy.

Saying goodbye to Lucy has been difficult, but having you around to remind me what this life is all about…there are no words. You've shown me compassion and care that feels far beyond your years.

Thanks for being my little reminder that life goes on, and it’s all good.

I love you bud.

I had a blog for Lucy that I stopped updating years ago. For the final post on our sweet baby girl, click here.

Listen

I read this today and it made me tear up (shocking, I know).
I have learned so much from you, and I'm happy to report that I do many of these things listed below already. Still, a good reminder...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/raluca-state/lessons-for-my-daughter_b_2409695.html?&ncid=edlinkusaolp00000009

Lessons for my daughter (or SON - please switch the he to she, where applicable):
1. Don't smoke.

2. Don't date or marry a man who smokes.

3. Don't worry about the boy you love at 13 who won't love you back. At 30, you won't remember his last name.

4. Do, however, worry a little about the boy you love at 24. He might become your husband, as your dad became mine. But if he doesn't, that's ok, too. You are only 24.

5. Learn only the basics in math. The quadratic equation will not come in handy. And I will not sweat you for it, I promise.

6. At your wedding, should you choose to go that route, spend the most money on your photographer and your rings.

7. Don't get in cars with drunk people. Call home instead, no matter the time or how old you are. Ask for your dad.

8. Don't stress about the cool kids. The less you care about them, the more they will care about you. And don't let them talk you into smoking.

9. Intern. We will help with the rent while you do.

10. Don't be defeated by "no." You will hear it many times before you hear "yes." Clearly, we are prepping you for that nice and early...

11. Don't wear too much bronzer. And groom your eyebrows, but don't go too thin. But you CAN sleep with your makeup on, really, it's no big deal.

12. Don't just be nice to your brother. Be his best friend, his biggest supporter, and his most constructive critic. Be the same to yourself.

13. Work really hard in your 20s, 30s and 40s, so that you hopefully won't have to after that. But play really hard, too. Without smoking.

14. You can't change people. Not men, not your friends, not your mother. Accept the ones you want to accept, move on from the ones you don't (except your mother, of course). You won't look back, I promise.

15. Know that the right music can change any mood.

16. Go to Paris. And then go again. And then go again.

17. Spend money on expensive shoes, handbags and jewelry. Don't waste it on expensive makeup and jeans.

18. Create a memory box. Keep it small, and throw out everything else. Your prized possessions will edit themselves.

19. Don't worry if you can't cook. Some things are just genetic. You won't starve.

20. You can hate me sometimes. And I can hate you sometimes. As long as we both remember that underneath all that hate, there is a love like no other.

Lessons for me: 
1. Don't smoke.

2. Be happy you married a man who doesn't smoke.

3. Don't sweat the small stuff. No, really, try not to. And that includes basically everything work-related.

4. The following sayings tend to ring true 9 times out of 10: "this too shall pass" and "everything happens for a reason."

5. There is no need to learn to drive a stick. Don't let people pressure you into thinking there is.

6. Even though New Year's resolutions are a waste of time and energy and you never stick to them, don't give it up. If anything, it holds you accountable for a day.

7. Find time for your husband. Find time for your friends. Find time for your mother. But before all that, find time for yourself.

8. Learning to meditate is much harder than it sounds. If it's stressing you out too much, it's clearly not for you. And that's ok. An hour in silence with a new issue of Vogue can be just as therapeutic.

9. When your 3-year-old is heading straight into meltdown mode, tickle her.

10. A well-positioned scarf can make any outfit look better.

11. A blow-out is worth every penny. Every time.

12. You know those best friends who never find time to call you back and only send you birthday greetings via Facebook? They are not your best friends.

13. Vacation once per year. A real vacation.

14. Snack.

15. When it is time to call it a day, call it a day.

16. When your kid is acting silly, laugh first, get annoyed second.

17. Embrace change. Of all shapes and sizes.

18. Create a playlist of your favorite songs from when you were 18. Keep it handy in the car.

19. Cry when you need to. But not at work.

20. Hate your husband sometimes. Hate your kids sometimes. Hate yourself sometimes. But remember that underneath all that hate, there is a love like no other.

Holiday Break: A Photo Essay

It's such a weird, awesome treat to have 13 whole days off in a row that I get to spend at home with you!  To be honest, that was by far the best Christmas gift I received. We relaxed, we went on adventures and caught up on life. You have learned so many new words, you're so smart, funny and attentive, curious and adventurous. 

I wrote myself a few notes so I didn't forget these tiny moments. Here's your list:

Of course you got a TON of gifts on Christmas, most of which you were quite content with, but whenever you opened a gift with clothes in them, you asked us to "put them back in" and pushed them away. Pretty cute, and also a bit offensive. But more cut than offensive. 

Trucks Yaaaaay (Anything: "Yaaaaay") I love your "yay" + clap. It reminds me of me.

Your favorite movie in the entire world is Finding Nemo. You know all the words.

Your 2nd fav movie is Cars. 

Favorite stocking stuffer = a slinky. Played with it for hours. "Watch Dis Grandma"

We stayed at Midnight Mass on Christmas eve for a total of 15 minutes bc you couldn't stop running. "Mama, can't stop wunning"

We made christmas cookies on 5 different days. You love baking. I love your love for baking.

Christmas morning, you crawled in bed with daddy and I, and proceeded to fall back asleep cuddled up to daddy. we were both speechless, still are. too sweet.

"Touch da wights" ~(christmas lights)

Fly! (Hands up, running as fast as you can)

OTHER cute stuff you're doing right now:

Hold dis for a second

You let the dogs in (goose and wink)

Lincoln sit!

(mama, dada, etc) Watch this!

You know in/out/up/down - all directions

You know most of your letters and numbers (WHAT?!?)

And here's a photo journey through our 13 days of awesomeness:

Everybody say: VACATION! (thanks iphone)

We finally visited OMSI and it was SO FUN! Oregon's Museum of Science and Industry has some great exhibits for kids. You are quite the little scientist, bud.

*****

Finger painting rules

*****

COOKIES!

*****

Crazy Christmas lights at Peacock Lane

*****

New Christmas Eve Tradition we started this year: Baking/decorating Christmas sugar cookies. Yum!

*****

Uncle Cam styled you on Christmas Eve - this will not be a new tradition. ;-)

*****

Christmas morning snuggles (SWOON)

*****

The (new) Portland Aquarium! We pet the sharks and stingrays and got to play in the tidepools where baby stingrays swam around. way cool, dude.

       

*****

Evergreen Aviation and Space Museum in McMinnville. This is your happy place. You are obsessed with all things airplanes and your eyes were just wide open the ENTIRE TIME! ZOMG!

*****

Another crisp December walk with goose. You make a great dogwalker (and puddle-jumper), bud.

*****

After puddle jumping, we hopped in the car and took an hour drive to the beach to watch the sunset. So thankful we live so close to the beach and have a car that likes driving on it. In addition to being a killer puddle-jumper and dog-walker, you're also a crazy beach race-car driver. 

*****

We spent New Years Eve at Kati's house with all of our favorite friends. We ate, we played games, you went to bed like a champ in the spare room and we all spent the night. A safe and lovely NYE. Yay for friends with kids!

Here's to the best year ever!